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T IPS FOR MANAGING GRIEF DURING THE HOLIDAYS : 1. Grief is the process of healing — don’t try to avoid it or pretend it isn’t there. 2. Set boundaries ahead of time. It’s okay to say no to certain events that might be painful for you. Be prepared for how you will handle the holidays. Decide in advance where you will go and for how long. Allow yourself the ability to leave a situation if you become overwhelmed. 3. Find a way to honor your loved one: cook their favorite food, play music that reminds you of them, decorate in a manner you know they would enjoy. 4. Don’t be afraid to create new traditions. Go to a restaurant for Thanksgiving rather than eating at home or change the gathering place or time. Many people find it helpful to go on a trip for the first holiday after losing someone. 5. Reach out to friends and family! You don’t have to do this alone. 6. Do something kind for others. Make a donation in your loved one’s name or volunteer for a charity. 7. Be patient with yourself. The first year of firsts can be the most difficult (first birthday, Christmas, Thanksgiving). Then, you can say, “OK, I have done this before.” Sometimes, in the hustle and bustle of the Holidays we ignore our mental health. It’s as important as ever to slow down and assess how you are coping. S YMPTOMS TO LOOK FOR : • Difficulty concentrating • Feeling irritable or angry • Feelings of exhaustion and fatigue • Feelings of loneliness • Lack of pleasure in normal activities • Losing interest in activities that you normally enjoy • Sleeping much more or much less than normal • Trouble making decisions • Withdrawing from friends and family The most important thing to remember if the holidays — or even just the stress of all that 2020 has thrown at you — is getting you down, is to reach out to a friend, pastor, or licensed professional and ask for help. You do not have to bear it alone! n Find us on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter OCTOBER/NOVEMBER 2020 33 ...................................................................................... Libby Fitzpatrick is a Licensed Professional Counselor in the River Region. 1 6 0 0 7 TH AV ENU E SOU TH B I RM I NGHAM , A L 3 5 2 3 3 ( 2 0 5 ) 6 3 8 - 9 1 0 0 C h i l d r e n s A L . o r g W E D O W H A T W E D O We work tirelessly to help kids get well because the world needs to see what Natalie dreams up. B E C A U S E C H I L D R E N H A V E D R E A M S .