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for an aging parent can bring a renewed sense compassion among family members. S ENIOR C ARE C ONVERSATION S TARTERS As with many difficult topics, beginning the discussion is often the hardest part. These conversation starters may help: • How is it living at home alone? Do you still feel safe? (You may want to mention specific safety concerns such as managing medication, falling on stairs, struggles in the bathtub or kitchen. Crime may be another fear they haven’t shared with you.) • Do you feel lonely sometimes? Would you like to spend more time with people your own age? • How do you feel about driving? Would you be interested in other options for transportation, so you don’t have to worry about getting where you need to go, car main- tenance costs, traffic, parking, etc.? • Is it ever hard to manage your finances and keep up with paying your bills? • Ever wonder about getting a helping hand with house- keeping and laundry? • Would you feel less stress if you didn’t have to worry about the house? W HEN STAYING AT HOME IS NO LONGER AN OPTION “Most of us, most of the time, want to age at home. But the re- ality is not everyone can, or should,” says Tonya Allen, Executive Director at CaraVita Village, a senior living community. “Some- times staying in your own home as you become increasingly frail is a poor choice. It can be lonely and even dangerous. It can also burn out family caregivers.” A traditional retirement community is an age-restricted, usually 55-plus community that enables older adults to live independently but with access to social activities and community amenities, such as transportation, yard maintenance services or fitness and recre- ation access. Educate yourself. As you learn more about senior care options, you’ll get ideas about what will fit your parent best. Admitting just how much help your loved one needs isn’t easy, and you may find yourself downplaying just how serious their need for help really is. But be as objective as you can. “Our community does thorough assessments to help place your loved one in the proper environment,” says O’Neal Green, Oak Grove Inn’s property man- ager. “The goal is to pinpoint their needs and place them in the level of care that fits their individual needs, such as … do they need independent living, assisted living or memory care.” A DVANTAGES IN CONSIDERING A SENIOR LIVING COMMUNITY … Downsizing — The first thing that many people think of as they approach retirement is downsizing. While it is absolutely possible to downsize without moving into a retirement/senior living community, it might be easer to do in one. Finding a smaller home that still fits your lifestyle without cramping your style can be challenging. One of the design features in almost all retirement Find us on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter SEPTEMBER 2018 45